bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize