What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
