i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
