Betty ford says i'm here all night
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
