You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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