I'm drive I can fine osifer
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
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