College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Randomize
