You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
4 words: hood of his car
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Even my vagina gasped.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Randomize
