Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
They are going to name an STD after you.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
