We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Randomize