I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
