Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Randomize
