we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
