im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
