All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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