Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Randomize
