what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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