I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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