did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Randomize
