I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
