Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
