So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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