drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize