I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
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