A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Randomize