The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
