Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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