JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Did I show you my penis last night?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
