I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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