i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
