so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
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just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
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Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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