So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize