pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
