Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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