You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
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four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
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I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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