like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Randomize
