Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
