i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
How many fucks given?
0.12846
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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