he thought i was a dude.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Randomize
