belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
