the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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