I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
