oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
