All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
The feeling are messing with the penis
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize