I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
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