YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize
