I feel like I'm in dance class right now
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
PANTIES FOUND
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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