This show inspires me to have sex in space
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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