he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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