I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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