I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
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Come see our sink grown plant.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
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There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
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