McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize