im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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