Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Randomize
