But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
